The Wall

Do you know the funny irony is?

It is when the blunt truth always hurts us, leaving you with the most awkward scenario on how to respond.

I build a wall, to protect and guard myself. A wall, so high and complex that I can't let anybody let in.

I'm proud to have built that wall, telling or implying to others that the wall is structurally built.

I am happy because I have a sanctuary on my own in which I am safe.

I am glad that wall protects me.

And the irony is?

Though I love watching how people try their best to pound that wall outside, laughing because they can never get in,

I am half-grateful of how others do their best to break in and enter that wall, because of their efforts.

I keep saying to them that please you can do better than that, break in...

then why am I building that wall in the first place?

That is sole purpose, is to protect and guard me.

Why am I loving people who do their efforts to break in, and discovering outside of that wall?

Then I realized that wall,

That wall becomes a prison.

As much as I repress it deeply, pushing myself to be comfortable being alone.

Telling myself that it is independence, and freedom.

Heck, I hate lying.

Though I commend myself that I use my brain a lot, reasoning and thinking all the time,

Truth is,

I'm lonely.

Perhaps, cold and forgotten?

Misunderstood by others.

But, it's their problem, not mine.

And I commend those people.

who took notice of me, thoughtful that they take their time to get to know me...

So instead of a wall,

I will build a bridge.

However, bearing in mind that I will still guard myself.