A Greeting

Silence and solitude are my most precious gifts to myself.

Words, and thoughts can be heard clearly when I'm alone.

I find it nice, and endearing. Thoughts about random things overlapping inside my head.

Even though people will judge you for being the quiet one, I learned to live with it.

Opinions aren't really based on facts and the truth.

I chose to believe in what my inner voice says.

To be gentle but have integrity and honesty.

People judge.

That's what they do when they are bored.

Well, without them the world cannot be as busy as it gets

The world cannot be functional and will be left as a dump of nothingness.

That's it.

and I have to say this too.

Merry Christmas strange and online paper. :)

Thank you for always listening.

Air mail

To the wind:

Every particle that you bring ahead, invisible or not, at least hear these words out.Words that I cannot speak to him, for I don't even know how to withdraw them.
At least, you are a long time friend for you always listen to me, alone and appreciative of the silence given.
I know that it was never mutual, or it will never be.However, I wanted to let these hidden feelings out before it will burst.Feelings that I masked with rational thoughts and hoodlums, hoping that someone will notice.

Hear these unrequited thoughts for him:

I know I am just a friend. It was never my decision that my feelings for you can change through time.
Though, I admit that I am cold and heartless.Beneath that, is a coward hoping for a glimmer of chance.
I just want you to hear me out.

I liked you. Why? I don't really know.

That's it ,for I don't want to hope anymore that these feelings can be reciprocated.

At least, I have confessed to you. I don't know how you will react. I think you may laugh, or even avoid me.

But please, Can I have one request?

For once, be honest. Be your old annoying self. So that, these cloud of sadness can flutter away with that wide happy smile of yours.

Please wind, breathe this mere words within.

For they remained unspoken, and pretty soon, these words will die out. If you can deliver it to him, I will be a little giddy for once.

From:

Blank.

Thoughts

Sometimes, I even wonder that inside this little world of mine can be a high wall to others.

Well, for me it is just a sanctuary of thoughts, and cacophony of ideas. Do they even have time to listen to their own thoughts?

I always do, heeding it as my mental voice. That's who I am and I have learned to trust it. 

But then again, every little world has its own ironic memories that keeps flashing back. Every corner of my head, is filled with happy and sad memories.

Whatever comes out of it, one does treasure both of those because of life. Ever since then, I realized that everything happens for a purpose.

The road is somewhat rocky, but one has no choice but to enjoy that journey. At least, the fragment of enjoying it is more of a positive outlook.

Beneath it.

Every time I see it.

It made me realize something.

Underneath that cold machine that processes information,

Gathers data and does assignments

is that neat and tidy box called Emotions.

White and fully adorned with decorations and color.

Beneath my grey and informative exterior,

that tough and expressionless soul doing a plate,

is a heart that is broken,and somehow used to being hurt.

Though I prefer following that rational part of the brain,

heeding my mind as my master,

I cannot help but wonder,

if one can accept that heart of mine that is not completely healed.

But then again, time is the best adhesive that repairs anything.

At least, beneath that cold facade,

lies a heart that is forgiving.

Behind that mysterious exterior, is a loyal person that can smile at adversities

Underneath it, is someone good.

At least even a little, it made me happier.

Exist

Do one ever knows the existence of one another?

Questions that seem bugging in my brain all along. The word, "Exist."

Exist, in the sense, that one is present but not necessarily accepted.

Oh, the irony of a person existing, for the sake of its shallow meaning. The person just exists, without depth of meaning, and the most common painful reason,

The lack of acceptance.

One does undergo that stage. The stage wherein one is insecure, void, and empty to the fact that he is useless and defenseless.

One who compromises himself just to please everyone, make others happy for he is afraid to show who he really is.

Well, a human person is a deep and complex specie to examine for it has layers of personalities that he truly want to discover.

Each layer will just show up, adapting to each situation just to fit in, and to compromise.

Well, that's every human's adaptation just to survive the bitch called, Life.

And sometimes, because of the toughness of life, they started to forget living.

Sometimes, I asked myself the same question.

Am I really living? or I just do stuff for the sake of it.

Heaven knows.

Motivational post

One day, I'm going to feel again.

That's a shimmer of motivation that I always tell myself even when, I'm busy and studying. I have to admit that it's a blessing.

A blessing in disguise, because I would not be able to discover myself and stand on my own.

Though, it is sad. First loves are always the first messes in life.

Well, no hard feelings taken. I have learned my mistake anyway.

Still, I'm happy for that friend of mine and I'm happy too, because I have learned to love myself even more.

People change, and feelings tend to grow apart.

Those memories are worth reminiscing, moments that I always treasure as a child.

But then again, life doesn't stop for anybody. It moves on.

I just tend to laugh it out.

If we end up together, I would still be that kid who is so naive and believes in happy endings and fairy tales.

I would still be that kid who lets everyone order her around, pleasing everybody.

I would still be naive, and scared.

I never would've grown.

You would not either.

So it is a win situation.

Thank you for making me realize that.

Thank you very much.

Introverted Thoughts

Hello.

One word that can start any conversation. Saying that word, makes both people at ease.

Conversation is an act of sharing ideas, thoughts and concepts. Well, that's how I define it unlike sharing emotions, and feelings.

Opinions about something that can make both worlds tick. Perhaps, that's why I prefer myself talking to myself, standing up on my own opinion, and never mind what people think and care about who I am.

Never caring of what people think and care about who I am.

The thought echoes like Hell, A symphony that my brain thrives just to be gentle with myself.

It's crowded, but I am in tune with my own thoughts and concepts. That's why I'm at best when I'm alone, free, and independent.

Most people tell me that I am the kind of person that suffers from deep social depression, with no friends to accompany it.

Well, a bullshit thanks to those people for they were wrong about that judgement.Thank you though for that honest opinion.

I never viewed my introversion as a weakness, and it pisses me off why people stoop me down. Well, that's their own opinion not mine.

It's funny though, they never realized that because I am not the type who throws tantrums at their face to fit them in.

However, behind my cold and logical shell, lies a forgiving heart that I hide in my sleeve always.

Goodbye.

A word that ends every conversation.